Why Sensitive People May Experience Burnout When Things Seem Fine

When "Perfect" Isn't Enough: The Unspoken Reality of Burnout in Ideal Work Settings

Let's get real—how many of us can actually say we're thriving, especially at work?

We often talk about burnout as if it only occurs in toxic or high-pressure environments. But what if I told you that you could be on the brink of burnout even when everything at your job seems perfect on paper?

You could be working with the best team, under a compassionate manager, with a workload that’s considered manageable. But here you are, waking up and dreading the week ahead. Sounds counterintuitive, right? This post is dedicated to all you Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) and anyone who has ever felt burned out even in seemingly "ideal" settings.

The Insidious Nature of Burnout

Whether you are working at an office, from home, or are a stay-at-home parent, burnout doesn't discriminate. It's not just the product of grueling hours or a toxic workplace culture. Personal challenges, a misalignment between your values and your tasks, and the sacrifice of your prime hours for a paycheck can all contribute. It's even more challenging for HSPs who can absorb emotional and physical energy from their surroundings.

In their groundbreaking book, "Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle," Emily and Amelia Nagoski shed light on the pervasive nature of burnout, particularly among women. Amelia herself was a hardworking mom with a doctorate, multiple part-time jobs, and a long commute. All of which led her to the hospital twice, despite thinking she had everything under control.

Emily brought her peer-reviewed science books to help Amelia deal with stress, emphasizing that emotions are not just psychological but also physiological events that occur in the body. The sisters point out that our modern-day stressors don't give us a complete cycle to release stress, unlike the adrenaline surge we would get if we were, say, running from a lion. Their mantra? Wellness isn't just a state of being; it's a state of action. This is even more crucial for HSPs, whose heightened sensitivities require more than just conventional coping strategies.

Self-Compassion vs. Self-Sabotage

The Quicksand of Overwhelm

In life's paradoxical way, the more we try to frantically escape feelings of overwhelm, the more overwhelmed we become. Imagine overwhelm as quicksand; the more you struggle, the deeper you sink. As HSPs, the natural instinct may be to do more to escape the feeling. But sometimes, the secret is to do less, not more.

Low Self-Esteem and Unhealthy Patterns

Many of us, particularly HSPs, face barriers like low self-esteem when it comes to changing old habits and patterns. This affects not just our professional life, but how we practice self-care and self-compassion. To break this cycle, we must bust the old myths that we don't deserve love or care.

Strategies for a Better You

1. Take a Break: Even a short period of rest can be rejuvenating. For HSPs, this could also mean finding a quiet space to meditate or simply breathe.

2. Evaluate Your Values: Make sure what you are doing aligns with what genuinely matters to you. This is often the root cause of dissatisfaction.

3. Find Your 'Why': Identify what genuinely drives you. Is it the impact you make, the money you earn, or the skills you master?

4. Lean Into Rest: This is more than just physical rest; consider emotional, mental, and even creative rest. Especially for HSPs, rest is not a luxury but a necessity.

5. Seek Professional Help: Whether it's therapy geared towards HSPs or talking to a trusted friend, external perspectives are invaluable.

Community and Self-Care

Amelia Nagoski sums it up beautifully: "The cure for burnout is not self-care; it's all of us caring for each other." As HSPs and as people striving in the modern world, it’s time to recognize that even "perfect" work environments have their pitfalls. Let's take deliberate action to ensure our work-lives don't just look good on paper but feel good in reality.

So, how about you? Have you ever felt like you’re running on empty, even when everything seems “perfect”? Let’s have an open dialogue and care for each other because wellness, especially for HSPs, is not a solo journey but a communal one.